my mother says parents can give you everything, except for luck. i dont know what luck really is, it's not reliable like sense of humor, it's not even transient like good looks, i really can't say anything certain about it, but it seems to be nice odds, odds in your favor. shifting probability. but then again, everything seems to be just chance. probability. odds. timing.
i did feel lucky many times in my life, like last night, in my dream, when a plane crashed into the building i was going to go into if only i would have found my lipstick in time. i didnt find it, so i didnt go in, so i didnt get squashed by this enormous plane (and i dont even use lipstick in waking life). i dont feel lucky that i have these fears of not finding a place to stay in time (i will be roomless, roofless, rootless from march 1st) turn into plane attacks in my dreams, but i dont feel unlucky, either.