you can have your cake and eat it, too

I love Bob Dylan. Not him him, but his music, I love it so much that it even makes me protective. Which I rarely get. The ToToM Dylan Mashed album knocked me out of my senses, it came like some next door kid whom you thought you'd hate before knowing better, just from watching him play on his side of the street, and then if he'd get the nerve t0 come talk to you on your side the first reaction would be some crazy, self-defensive line sprinkled with intrigue -- so just like that i was curious at first, plus a bit angry, "how dare he?!" - then completely won over, mesmerized, almost to the extent of not wanting to play with any other kids. ever. again. i just love it. i love it more than i love really sunny days. and just for the comparison, i am crazy about really sunny days.

i like (some) things

"The serial number of a human specimen is the face, that accidental and unrepeatable combination of features. It reflects neither the character, nor the soul, nor what we call the self. The face is only the serial number of a specimen."

M. Kundera

photo by R.Avedon

i've loved and lost

and they say its better than to have never loved at all. but i dont know who they are or why i know what they say when i dont know who they are.

and nothing and no thing has ever made me feel so happy and so free. somehow, i guess we're quite alike, stubbornly and freely, she has to go her own way, i have to go mine.
if i'd choose a song for her it would be this.

bă, adică!

mă duc acasă. acasă unde numai acasă poate să fie, mi-e dor reumatic, mi-e dor în oase şi-l simt cînd e vreme rea. băi, mă duc acasă!

don't ask, don't tell

i feel weird. i've felt weirder, but then i didnt want people to know. now i feel better, but still weird. i'm listening to songs over and over again, i'm eating chocolate after brushing my teeth, i get lost in pictures of strangers, i want to read when i watch something, write when i read something, and watch something most of the time, i think too much of dancing, movies, promenades outside of contexts, i can't remember my dreams like i used to.
i feel weird. i dont feel sad. i feel weird. so weird that the word starts losing its meaning.

i want to learn new tricks. and i can.
i'm not an old dog, maybe an odd ogg, since i've been all noise lately.
i want to learn new tricks.

who's in charge of this?!

it starts with enjoyment. you love it. feel refreshed. boy oh boy rain is supercalifragilisticexpialidocius!

then, like everything, too much of it starts to irritate you. make you paranoid. scared. less bold in outfit choosing.

then comes the part where you're really miserable. you scream inside your head "gimme a break!" or "what's the big idea, buster?", although it serves no purpose.


well, at least that's how it is for me now.
in conclusion:
p.s. "getting caught in the rain" has lost all its romantic interpretation.
p.p.s. either it's been raining for too long or i'm too keen on my sandals.
p.p.p.s. both affirmations above are true.

ma' shmallow (the 'r' is silent)

there is no sound labeled as 'music' that annoys me as much as club/trance/house/hardhouse music. i could tell that they are trying to send out some messages, express feelings of some sort, but i just don't get it. for a while i thought it was me, i felt a bit weird, really thinking there's something wrong with me, and i'm still sorry at times for my super low tolerance to it.

i can't stand it mostly because it bores me. it bores the pores out of me. so yeah, i think it sucks.

what do the fans think? what? what?!!

no judgment, just awe.

no rain, no pain

i like rain. i really like rain. i looooove ... spending time with rain. the only reason i came up with that title is because it rhymed. well not only, but this is of little importance.


(via http://creampuff.tumblr.com/)

what i do not love is the weather in copenhagen. not because it rains, of course not, but because our interaction just got personal. it's like this: whatever you are expecting when you get out of the house in the morning will be the exact opposite of what will happen later during the day.
eg:
case 1: you think it will be warm - it will be cold
case 2: you think it will be cold - it will be warm

not done.
it's not this simple, cause then you could just always do the opposite of what you think, but it knows that and will do the opposite of that, and then if you want to double outsmart it and stick with your first option it will know that too, somehow, and in the end there's just no winning. oh, actually there is, sometimes, few times, it gives you the perfect weather at the perfect time, maybe even when you happen to be with the perfect people around and then you think dully to yourself that Copenhagen is beautiful.

see the irony?

i'm not going to miss constantly being wrong about the weather.

anachronistically, me

i heart free lolli lollipops

today was a very atypical monday.
got my heart in it's right place or somewhere near, got my hopes as high as the elephant's eye, got a long awaited answer from the dreamy internship in india working with this and a heart shaped lollipop from the pizza guy.
my heart shaped lollipop reminded me of this song.

as well as 7 others. :)

yikes

dreamt of war and bombardments. didnt even watch anything related that could've triggered it.

War
To dream of a war, signifies disorder and chaos in your waking life You are experiencing some internal conflict or emotional struggle which is tearing you up inside. Alternatively, the dream also indicates that you are being overly aggressive or that you are not being assertive enough. Perhaps you need to be prepared to put up a fight in some area of your life. On a more direct level, the dream may be reflection of current wars around the world.

Bomb
To see a bomb in your dream, indicates that you may be going through a potentially explosive and trying situation in your waking life. The bomb could represent repressed desires and unexpressed emotions that are likely to explode or burst if not dealt with soon. It could be something within yourself, such as the desire to explode with anger over an issue that's affecting you.
(via Dream Moods)
so there. now going back to my normal, in-tempestuous life.

play, just

words make the world go round.
word is just world without l.
words make the world.
sometimes i have trouble pronouncing world.
it comes out like worrrd.

why don't you just live?
why don't you live just?
why don't you just leave?
why don't you live, just?

caramba!

ineffective

i have the tendency to only rate songs i love. no, not the tendency, that's what i do all the time. so there i am, with many GBs of music either rated as 5 stars or not rated at all. how does this help my personal music management? you'll say it doesnt, but how does that help?!

say goodnight, kevin

it's sent and my fingers are crossed. this time, not with each other. :)

Deciding on the right thing to do in a situation is a bit like deciding on the right thing to wear to a party. It is easy to decide on what is wrong to wear to a party, such as deep-sea diving equipment or a pair of large pillows, but deciding what is right is much trickier. The truth is that you can never be sure if you have decided on the right thing until the party is over, and by then it is too late to go back and change your mind, which is why the world is filled with people doing terrible things and wearing ugly clothing.

- Lemony Snicket, Horseradish: Bitter Truths You Can’t Avoid

i got it

sometimes you need some people to get lost with.
but getting lost is only the enactment of finding yourself.

deinfinitely

(same song over and over)

and if M the inventor loved his water pipe as much as i love my coincidences, well i dont know what that would be but here's what i ran into:

I knew that there were no guarantees. No way of knowing what came next for me, for him, or anybody. Some things don’t last forever, but some things do. Like a good song, or a good book, or a good memory you can take out and unfold in your darkest times, pressing down the corners and peering in close, hoping you still recognize the person you see there.

- Sarah Dessen, This Lullaby

and then i hit this.


which is coincidental to one long conversation on a breezy and sunsetty balcony.

what will be will be? going back to "the best times of your life have not yet been lived" - the most efficient self indulging be-more-mindful statement :)

sleep i must.
head hurting is.
sun greediness has its drawbacks. speech alteration is apparently one of them, but only apparently, cause in reality sun stroke is only used as an excuse. redundancy might be one real side effect though, cause i'm still listening to the same song.